How to not let the scale control your happiness | 34 of 90
It’s interesting that as a woman, we allow our weight to have so much power over us. Whereas most men don’t even make any sort of emotional connection with the scale. How did we even get that way???
I think it has everything to do with generations of our mothers, grandmothers, great grandmothers, and their mothers before them being told that the skinnier, the tinier, and the smaller they were, the better. The more delicate and the more beautiful you were, the more likely you were to attract a man and eventually get a husband to care for you. So, women’s ideal body types were really men’s ideal body types FOR women. Then the media solidified the idea that thinner was better by featuring women of only a certain body type on the covers of their magazines, therefore perpetuating the idea that thinner women were the most desirable women.
The fact that us women today are still so obsessed with slender frames and small waists shows us just how hard it is to shake off centuries worth of irrational thinking towards our self worth – based on our size!
Today, in the age of body positivity, so much work is already being done to reverse that way of thinking! Women have thrown out scales in protest! And you know what? I think that’s a great thing.
But what if you want to get fitter, get healthier, and embark on a journey that may require you to use some sort of measurement tool? Well first of all, if a scale really gives you PTSD, then try using your clothes or a measuring tape as a way seeing change! However, know this: IT IS POSSIBLE to have a non-toxic relationship with the scale – as impossible as that may sound right now. Trust me. I did it.
How to get over the fear of stepping on a scale!
#1. First, if you currently are in a place where stepping on the scale is CONTROLLING YOU (you’re happy when the number is lower and you’re depressed when the number is higher), I suggest you not step on the scale for a while in order to make your weight something that isn’t a big deal. Learn to be ok with not knowing how much you weigh! Instead focus on how you feel. This will train you to understand that how much you weigh has nothing to do with your awesomeness. I didn’t step on the scale for a few years. I def needed the space.
#2. When you feel like you are ready to step on the scale, ask yourself how this information will help you. If you don’t have a good reason, then you’re not ready. Your why for stepping on the scale should be because seeing this information – whether higher or lower than you want – is going to positively benefit you in some way.
#3. Realize that when you see this number, it is JUST a number. Just a data point. It doesn’t tell you how beautiful you are, how talented you are, how smart you are, what a good person you are, and it says NOTHING about your self worth. The scale is only a tool that tells you a number. That is all. The number is meaningless unless you choose to give it a meaning. So DO NOT let the scale have power over you! It’s just an object!
#4. Stepping on a scale, plunging into a cold pool, getting a shot at the doctor’s office…sometimes you just gotta close your eyes and just do it. Because usually, you end up realizing that it wasn’t that bad! So when you are ready, step on the scale, view the number, and try not to get emotional about it. If it’s lower than you thought and your goal is weight loss, then good – whatever you’re doing is working! If it’s higher than you thought – first, don’t panic! All it is is a temporary number that YOU have the power to change.
So yeah, that’s how I got over my fear of stepping on the scale. I decided not to view the scale as some scary thing that judged me. I made the decision to view it as a tool – that’s it. Seeing it as just that stripped it of it’s power. Power that it never had, but that I gave it.
Yesterday’s recap:
Fit Journal entry. This week my weight has gone up because of the bloat, but like I said above, weight is just a temporary number, so it doesn’t bother me. My journey is 90 days long so I have time to make adjustments. That’s the whole thing with this. You can’t do it quick. You need to give yourself time in order for your transformation to really hold strong.
In the morning, I took Drew’s advice and mixed some BHB’s (exogenous ketones) with MCT oil powder (helps to increase my fat intake) in water for a mini breakfast drink. He said that the taking the exogenous ketones would increase the ketone levels in my body, therefore magnifying whatever I am already doing while being on the keto diet.
FYI on ketones: Being on a keto diet means you’re restricting carbs and eating moderate amounts of protein. The goal is to get your liver to begin converting fat into ketones which are molecules that can be used as fuel when blood sugar is in short supply. When you use ketones for fuel instead of glucose for fuel, the benefits include appetite control, improved mental clarity, constant energy, and increased physical performance.
I don’t know if I really felt a difference in my workout, but it did taste pretty good! The strawberry lemonade BHB goes a long way. I originally had 1 scoop of the BHB with 1/2 a scoop of the MCT oil in a 20 oz water bottle but it was sooooo sweet! I had to mix it with like 60-70+ oz of water for my taste preference. I’m more of a “hint water” type of drinker, so maybe it’s just me! But in any case, it got me to drink more a ton of water pretty fast!
For lunch I ordered the keto bowl from Tocaya Organica. This is cauli rice with avo, chicken, bell peppers, brussel sprouts, and some cheese on top. I poured a ton of hot sauce on top!
As a late afternoon mini meal, I had 2 bacon slices with 2 eggs (sprinkled with Trader Joe’s Everything But the Bagel Seasoning), and butter lettuce.
For dinner, I made cauli rice and ate it with 2 bacon, some shishito peppers, and a mixture of shredded chicken with avo and tomatoes.
Then after dinner, I had a probiotic stick to help with my gut health.
This has been a tough week for my body, but hopefully with these supplements, something will help!
25 thoughts on “How to not let the scale control your happiness | 34 of 90”
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Cassey thank you so much for this article and how to lose your fear of the scale. Even just reading it made me cry because until until now the scale has so much power over me. I cry whenever I step on the scale. I didn’t step on the scale for about a year and a half, and then last week I tried. My mother convinced. I was crying before I even stepped on it and then when I saw my weight I cried harder. But reading this is proof that I can get rid of that scales power, just like you! Weight does not define my talent or my beauty. Thank you so much Cassey!
It’s ok Camilla! Cry it out. The scale had the same effect on me too. It’s damaging. Just feel the feelings, allow yourself to feel how negative it makes you feel. Then take a stance and vow to never let it make you feel that way again!
I totally agree with the first part. Women have been taught for quite a long time to look pretty, beautiful, sexy etc. to please men, to please others, to be the way they should be. So with all that pressure, maybe it’s harder and a much bigger of a shock when the scale doesn’t give us the number that we “want”. Which is frustrating and unbelievable. It’s really sad the way -some- women tend to see, treat (?!) their body because of outside expectations that probably wouldn’t have existed otherwise. Now it makes me wonder, do men weight themselves more??? Do they generally weight themselves at all?
Do you generally like your bacon soft opposed to crispy?:)
I don’t think that saying women had been told for centuries that thinner is better is the right way of putting it. It is true, the beauty standards always were existing, but it wasn’t always about being slim. There were times when “big” women were seen as more wealthy, more likely to carry children. So it deffo wasn’t always about being slim, though it was – and is – in the more current times. Just wanted to clarify a bit, but loving your journey! For me, when it comes to scales, I never really had a problem, thankfully. I’m always like “oh, it’s still bit too much for my liking, well, we’ll see next time, let’s get back to living my life”. I always say that I weigh more because muscles are pretty heavy! 😀
You’re right! I guess I mean in recent times. Remember this? 😉 https://www.blogilates.com/what-id-look-like-if-i-had-the-perfect-body-throughout-history/
Oh yeah, right! It was such a cool idea as well!
This is great advice for those who still have trouble with the scale! I have let the scale dictate my self-worth since I was very young, which lead to toxic weight-loss journeys and long nights of crying. Once I finally got healthy when I was older, I still never managed to repare my relationship with the scale. But you’re so right, it has the power we give it. I stopped giving it power when I got pregnant, and I started gaining weight. It’s as if seeing the numbers rise and being happy broke all of its power over me. I needed to gain weight to have a healthy baby. It confirmed that my pregnancy was going well! Halfway through when I gained ten pounds and it plateaued for a while, I was happy and then was wondering hmm when will I gain more weight? Is everything okay? It was really the exact opposite of a weight-loss battle, and it was so enlightening. The scale is a tool, use it like one or don’t use it at all! Stick to a tape measure or buy a cute dress in a size smaller and THAT will dictate your progress! Once I start my post-pregnancy weight loss journey, a beautiful pale blue dress is my goal! Not a number on the scale, not a number on the tape measure, but I just want to fit in to all of my clothes like before, and a dress that was a little too snug. Set reasonable goals for yourself and you WILL acheive them!
Isn’t it interesting how the way we want to perceive numbers changes…everything?
Cauliflower usually bloats me! Do you think that could be contributing to your bloat? Also loving the daily blogging.
The same for me, I love cauliflower and broccoli but the bloating they cause is awful
I love u Cassey! I’ve been following your workouts for years and during that time i’ve lost a lot of wheight and ganed a lot of wheight but i don’t care about my wheight so much anymore because i’ve found my happy place and my happy wheight. And thaks to your workouts i’m stronger than ever! I don’t really use the scale but i know how much i wheight and i think that’s enough. But you do your thing and as long as you are healthy and happy, it’s all that matters.
PS. I’m worried about the amount of animal and dairy fat people on keto diet are eating. Clogged arteries is no joke!
Ya, me too honestly. So I am not sure this is a long term thing!
I take these vitamins from HUM. The ‘gut instinct’ is great 🙂 You can take a quiz in the beginning to see what you want/need. They also have hair & nail vitamins 🙂 It’s definitely more long term though!
Thanks for all the inspiration and meal ideas 😊🖤
Of course!
I really like point #2 for stepping on the scale! Reading it actually made me take a minute to sit back and examine why I weigh myself and what I do with that information. That mini reflection is something that I think we should all have now and then whenever we’re on any sort of health journey (are we collecting data points because it’s habit/we’re attaching emotional weight, or are we using them as the objective tools they’re meant to be?). As usual, great post Cassey!
Thanks!
I am so sad there are no shishito peppers near me! I’ve been to all the grocery stores and I cannot find a single one! Damn you, Montgomery! I keep seeing you post them and I just want them more and more!
I’ve had a horrible week myself, though all self-induced…Binging is back and I don’t know why and also know why. I’m stressed, anxious, and on top of that on my period. While at work I maintain food well, but as soon as I leave and it’s dinner time, its like no control. If there’s food, its all gone, and when it’s gone then I’ll go find more. It’s so frustrating the lack of control, I also feel awful afterwards. Why do I do this to myself? Scales have never affected me emotionally, they’re a tool, but as I go through this time where I see the garbage remains of what I’ve eaten, i get emotional and self-hating and it turns into a vicious cycle.
Jeeze, I went on a rant. My apologies. I hope your gut improves and the bloating continues to deflate!
Do you think maybe “redirecting” this anxious energy could work? It has worked for me when I come home from my very stressful job and want to eat EVERYTHING. I either have a snack or full dinner if my body needs it, and then take a walk or do a workout. Afterwards I might want a small snack, but having a block of fitness time around dinner helps me look forward to something other than food and successfully lets me decompress from the day. Hope it helps!
Just slow down and concentrate on the taste and texture of the food you’re eating. I used to have the same problem. I would eat a ton of food really fast and I would eat too much, and I would never taste it or enjoy it! But if you slow down and enjoy, you’ll register how full you are sooner. Hopefully this helps!
I love everything about this article and I am also very jealous of your beautiful Blender Bottle 😭 I want it so badly
I’ll be honest when I say I’m not a fan of the keto diet. Maybe it’s because I medically cannot do it. My mother tried to convince me I could but uh no, my body cannot handle all the fat. The whole concept really doesn’t make sense to me. Then having to take supplements? What ever happened to taking just a multivitamin? I’m really trying not to be negative about your journey! If it’s working for you that’s great! Will the keto thing be a lifestyle change? Or is it just for the 90 days? I’ve seen conflicting statements about the benefits of doing this long term. That’d be cool to see some research done on that! Anyway keep slaying away! You’re doing great and still love the blogging everyday. Something to look forward to!
It definitely seems like a fad diet, and there are clearly people making money on all of these supplements and shakes. All of that bacon can’t be good for you, either. Kind of disappointed to see Cassey jumping on a fad diet bandwagon like this.
It’s been really interesting following your journey so far Cassey! I would howver like to point out that skinny has by no means always been the ideal for women and that the ideal body shape and size has varied quite a bit depending on the time and culture, e.g. I remember seeing a Finnish ad from the mid 20th century (maybe 50s?) that was advertising candies for weight gain to achieve the ideal fuller body. Also, it was easier to fake having the ideal body with clothes in the past especially when people wore more covering clothing. Although it could well be that body ideals have always been more stringent for women!
It would be awesome if you could show us how you grocery shop and how to make a list of all the essentials etc