I had to learn to stand up for myself….
Ok guys, time for some TRUTH TALK:
Growing up, I was taught to be obedient, to avoid conflict, and to make people happy – which for the most part worked very well and kept me from getting in trouble. BUT, as I’ve grown up, I’ve realized that it has shaped me in a way that subconsciously made me afraid to stand up for myself. Like, TERRIFIED – because I hate upsetting other people. But the truth is – life isn’t perfect and you have to have the downs to appreciate the ups…you have to have bad people to appreciate the good people.
I’ve had to tell numerous individuals things they didn’t want to hear. And you know what? IT SUCKS. But you know what sucks even more?? When people think they can step all over you and take advantage of you. That’s not ok. And guess what? In many cases, ego and pride will get in the way of the other person even trying to understand where you’re coming from, so – they don’t belong in your life anyway. You’ve got to rise above to protect your soul and your sanity.
I am grateful to be where I am today, living the life I love with the people I love, because of the choices I’ve made…to stand up for myself and for the people I care about. As scary and uncomfortable as it may be, I hope you choose to confront your demons. I know it’s painful, but to get rid of the pain, you’ve got to deal with it head on. 👊
7 thoughts on “I had to learn to stand up for myself….”
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I’m 28 and this is how I felt basically my whole life. Just always keeping my mouth shut, trying to avoid conflict and secretly feeling really angry and upset. I have alwasy been “sweet” and known as the nicest girl. And it’s only of late that I’ve started to talk back and stand up for myself, and people don’t like it… in fact it’s the people who are the most aggressive in my life who have accused me of becoming “easily angered” and “whoa, what happened to you?”, acting like I’m overreacting or oversensitive. But I know it’s not true. I’m not being nasty or saying anything rude, but simply defending myself I get that reaction! But your right… it’s what’s necessary. And most importantly despite that to keep your kindness and never let that change. Never be mean to others, but have enough self respect to defend yourself.
My goodness, thank you so much for writing this! I am currently going through the same situation. I was always raised to please other people and to belittle myself. Because I was raised like that I definitely could tell that some people saw me as “prey” and that hurt me inside. Right now I’m going through a crisis and I really needed to hear advice or people who have experienced the same thing. I’m glad you did what you did and you have such a bright life. Thank you again for sharing because it at least motivates me to step up for myself and love myself.
Ok, so I have been away from your website for awhile because life took me there. This is the second post I read today that has really hit home. Keep doing what you do, Cassey! Many of us like you need to hear what you are saying!
I’ve been stepped on a lot of times, but I still can’t seem to stand up for myself. I still can’t say “No” to my relatives fearing that they will hate me and spread gossips about me being selfish. I tried it once and it went so bad that I can see how some of my relatives didn’t like me. They have thrown glares and stuff and all I have done was cry. I’ve wanted to be strong but I’m not really sure how, but reading this actually made me think things through.
Hey Cassy. I’m a new member of blogilates 😃just wanted to let you know how what you do has changed my life. I have suffered with depression for many years I decided to exercise or at least start doing something that would keep me occupied and stumbled across your videos. I began blogilates and it has changed my life it’s changed the way I feel, the way I look at situations as well as the way I look 👍🏼 every time I’m feeling down I would just switch to your videos and exercise and over time it became part of my daily living. It doesn’t only keep me occupied but has positively impacted me emotionally, mentally and most importantly physically. Even the things you say while working out. And to think I didn’t start it to look good I just did cause it made me feel good. Really wish now I could become an instructor but watching you and just doing it is good enough for now. Thank you and god bless with your journey and changing peoples lives. With love from South Africa🇿🇦
I Love this, I need to learn to, but how?
I love this message, it’s so meaningful and honest. Thanks for sharing